My Black Christmas...the day i lost my...

This Christmas mark an anniversary and serve as my Black Christmas...songs wishing for white Christmas...well mine is dark black...

What do ppl do during Christmas...i wonder...i never ever celebrate a 'real' Christmas...to me is just like another ordinary day...except will be going to church that is not on sunday...to attend and hear what the pastor or reverend has to preach to remind us what this day actually mean and this and that...ppl around me will go crazy finding present to give...to give and receive...i never receive one...so i dont know the meaning of Christmas...where TV especially cartoons focus on...to find the real meaning of Christmas...and YES!! i watch CARTOON!!...

And sometimes i will be ask to perform for Christmas event...so at least there is something special on that day...if i am called that is...apart from that...is just another ordinary day...but being just another ordinary day and notfeeling the Christmas 'merry and joy' is not enough...25th become from bad to worse...

Is been a year since that little incident happen...and what a day to happen...a day i will never forget...to remind myself of my own ignorance...serves me right you might say but still the pain is there if i am to think about it...i wont cry though...just wont have a good feeling...and to some of you, you know what i mean when i dont feel good..."you wouldnt like me when i am angry' scenario...lol

To those i wished you a Merry Christmas i meant it...be merry and enjoy the festival...but i will only be lying to myself if i am merry that day...so that is why i dont wish...it will only sadden me by reminding me when i lost my...

Im Back

Now that i am awake from my deep slumber/hibernation is time for this blog to be filled with rubbish from my point of view of course...and not to forget ppl around me

i would like to take this opportunity to wish all a Happy New Year!! A year has just almost gone by replaced by a new one...so what you gonna do this year? Same old same old or planning to do something that rise above the rest...to be different for once in your life...to beat the mundane life...or succumb and surrender to everyday life hoping for tomorrow to come only to wish it away and hope for the next day...

Like i say...your life your choice!!

PS: Notice i dont wish Merry Christmas....i have my reason...those i wished...im just wishing you a merry Christmas...and pretending to be merry myself...i will explain on the next post